There's this string
I follow I don't know
what else I can
do sometimes
yanking it hand
over hand some-
times just inching
along looping it
up lassoing
it around my left
elbow I ease it
out a centi-
meter or millimeter
at a time I tease it
loose something's
raveling or
unraveling
something's
disappearing
as the days
tick by and
the nights roll
on and my beard
fills in and my
hair thins out as
this string puddles
up piles around
my feet its rivery
loop-de-loop
trail running behind
me like a single
endless skinny
footprint like
a sign like a
clue a story a
song oh where
does it come from
oh where are we
going this
string and I
I think I
could do
this
forever
[first appeared in Cave Wall]
Driving Out to Innisfree
—for Hilda
Naturally we zipped right by.
Had to backtrack along that
low wall of mismatched rock.
Drizzly fog. Ben Bulben only in
my imagination. Our rented hatchback
skittery on the one paved lane.
Now where was it he dreamt
of laying down his head to dream?
Pretty sure our last turn
was a wrong one and there
it was: a muddy hump in a shallow
lake. Where would he stick
the one-room shack? Keep
the bees? The bean rows would be
short and crooked and then
the words shook free and I saw it
for what it was: a thickety clump
of trees out there. Less place
than idea, a stepping stone from idea
to ideal. That desire to be away
from everything. No sign,
even now. God knows, no crowd.
I stood a bit, hood up. Hitched up
my shorts. But who'd go Thoreau
and set up shop there? It still works best
at a distance. Sometimes what we want
is to keep wanting. So—
shaggy trees? Soggy grass? This dot
of green in sight but out of reach
across brown water puckered
with rain? Check, check, check.
And silvery morning and cricket-song
keep you in the clear. Get me back
behind the wheel. Hang out in
the in-between till peace snaps into place
like a period at the end of the line.
[first appeared in Barn Owl Review]
The
Chair
That
broad-shouldered, tufted wingback,
its
plush, red velvet heft
bulked
out over hand-carved feet,
those
feet I came eye to toe with
shimmying
up the ladder
from
the church floor to the tiny loft—
the
whole house maybe thirty
feet
squared, a country
chapel
far out in the country—
and
wondered, just squeezing in
myself,
how the hell it got there.
It
looked untouched
and
untouchable, a bull in a pen
too
small to turn around in. Was it
built
there? Hammer and
lathe,
pale curlicues of wood shavings drifting
to
the corners as sawdust glitters down
onto
the altar. The upholsterer licks
a
thick thread, then needles it up.
A
boy presses hard to hold the springs
and
batting down as the old man loops in
with
the first stitch. Or else
imagine
pulleys, block and tackle, wheeze
and
grunt, a good rope and—
who
knows?—a horse
to
tie it around, then lead him out
the
back door. Heave and
hoist.
The chair rises
with
each breath—
just
look at it, floating there—
till
it can be snugged into place
up
here where it must wait
and
wait, this big seat looking out
over
everything, as if
for
you know who.
Snow
in Early Spring
dusts
the green shoots
poking up
from the
dirt
the
yellow crocus
gone
white on
one side
pale buds against a pale sky
snow in early spring—
the last
flakes
fill the cups
of the
first daffodils
flurries in early spring—
tiny
piles blown
against the north side
of each
low thing
front
stoop
back stoop
cemetery
stones
not a memory
but the trace of a memory
gone
before I could write this
down—
but once you say once
a door swings open
a story begins
even as
it fell
the snow
turned
back to rain
and yet—
what we
felt was snow
so soft so slow
drifting
down all around us
once in early spring
Everything
in
Iceland was the wrong color
or misplaced or mis-sized, bumped up
against
one another, so each hour
on the road we rolled through one world
and
turned a corner into the next—
the one-lane bridge that spanned
a stream
bed long run dry, barely
there anymore, and the black
sand
beach, the grainy gravel desert
where the wind gusted cold, gray;
a
waterfall chloriney green, not far
from another that fell through a crease
in the
cliff—one white fold
of water. Even the lava fields, now
so much
tired old rock, crumbled
and reefy, were stippled green.
We
pulled over to check
the map, stepped off the road and saw
what
we'd been seeing was moss
run rampant in the damp. That green
was like
getting to give
what I'd give to go back and see
what I
once missed—
in that shady corner behind the shrine
nearly
lost, nearly not a shrine
in the gray outskirts of Tokyo, one stop past
where
most people stop looking:
that plush green velvet, the yellow-
green,
the gray-green, that fuzz
and fringe, that other idea of beautiful,
the
frangibility of blue-green velour
on that small arrangement of rocks—
it would
be like disappearing
into a tiny mountain range, that careful
arrangement
of small rocks, that weird
secret, the old monk’s moss garden
hidden
behind the back wall at Kakusu.
A
Prayer
The
wind in the trees
reminds
me. Stars, the clouds
blown
out by wind to uncover
the
stars, remind me. Third yank
on
the starter cord, the snow
blower
not turning
over,
my neighbor's groan
then
sigh, the breath pluming
out
of his mouth white
in
the cold, white like the snow
that
now he must shovel,
remind
me. Old brown leaves
pressed
flat, frozen gray in sheets
of
ice, remind me. The river
running
fast and dark reminds me.
River
that remembers
and
forgets. River that rises
as
mist and falls back as rain,
snow
that falls and piles up and
melts
away. Trees like slashes
of
charcoal, pencil strokes so dark
against
that white, now fading
into
gray, into the darkening sky.
Night
that falls, falls
over
everything. Remind me,
remind
me, remind me.
Matthew
Thorburn is the author of three books of poems, including This Time Tomorrow (Waywiser Press, 2013) and Every Possible Blue (CW Books, 2012). He lives and works in New
York City. For more information, visit www.matthewthorburn.net.
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