They had to have climbed—the wives of sea captains, ships’
first mates and on down the line, the wives, the betrothed
of harpooners and deck hands, climbed belfries above
where they worshipped, climbed to the roofs where they
lived, up
dark narrow stairways, steep ladder-like steps, ladders
themselves, ascending, holding on to railings or rungs,
rope lines or walls, heading straight up by the chimney
or winding around the tower, each the need to see
for herself, my need now, up Nantucket’s First
Congregational Tower, how much closer to him
could she get, I get, than this horizon so vast,
so empty, that glorious many-masted vessel
long gone. Not returning. No, not widow’s walks,
says the church member I meet at the top. Just walks,
those white railed platforms around or next to a home’s
central chimney, where they checked for the build-up of
pitch,
pine the wood they burned, kept burning, where they stored
buckets
of sand to throw on fires started so easily.
Likewise the librarian insists walks, not widow’s
walks. Okay, not widow’s walks, romantic term
a journalist coined decades later. But I say
they had to have climbed. Right there in front of them
and all that longing to look beyond, long her refusal
to believe he would not return, longer yet
her longing for him, how it rolls in and over
without warning, like fog, then the inevitable
climb back down, the pitching forward, having to hold
myself back, hands out to hold onto anything,
still
descending down, down, when does it end—that walk?
[I am grateful to the Nantucket Historical Association
Research Library for the materials it allowed me to read.]
Moira Linehan is the author of two collections of poetry,
both from Southern Illinois University Press:
If No Moon (2007) and Incarnate Grace (2015). Her poem “Entering the Cill Rialaig
Landscape” is the First Place Grand Prize winner of Atlanta Review’s 2016 international poetry contest. She can be
reached through her website www.moiralinehan.com.
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